Because You Really Like Me!

What the hell are my peers doing to make a man that does absolutely nothing to make you like him think that you like him?

No offense...

"I think you like me because you wrote about me." Is the sentence that inspired this post. Pobrecito. I write a dating blog and we went on a date. I can kind of understand why Adnan would think I'm crushing really hard if I try to sit in space where I try to empathize with inflated ego and delusional self-confidence. I mean- I've told that him I think he's hot. No one can take that away from him! He is hot! I also think he's smart and talented at what he does. However, I don't know many people that aren't hot, smart, and talented; I'm a working artist. Those are the prerequisites to be a working artist and this is NYC. If that were enough to capture a girl's affections, we'd all be running around love-struck. Not sitting at chic little bars helping each other pick between men over martinis. Just last week I chimed in on a group of girls deciding between two investment bankers, a B List celebrity, and a tech CEO. It takes more than looks and cashflow to impress a woman. And even if she picks you, it takes even more to keep her...

In my socioeconomic bracket, most girls have a doting, divine daddy. A daddy that sends them money "just because he's thinking of them". A daddy that "does anything for his little girl". A daddy that calls them a car any time of day, but especially if the sun has gone down. A daddy that makes impressing his daughter as difficult as possible. In my case; a daddy, grandfather, and uncles that make certain that their Princess Iman doesn't like lazy men. I say all this to again ask the question: "What the hell are my peers doing to make a man that does absolutely nothing to make you like him think that you like him?"

Ladies! What are you doing that let Adnan Shivrani hit my line after planning nothing for me, showing me no chivalry, and not even showing up to house with a gift, thinking that I would "like him a lot"? What are you guys doing and how can I help you fix it? Clearly, unbeknownst to me, there are groups of young women being impressed enough to like a man who does nothing. Girls get a grip! Last night, when I heard these insane words fall from Adnan's lips, I was deeply confused. I couldn't believe it until I got on Are We Dating the Same Guy NYC and read through all the high key delusional posts on there. I see them all the time and I think to myself "that's weird, but out of the ordinary". Looking at them all at once made me realize that some of my peers are desperate for any male attention. I'm seeing "we've been on 3 dates in 3 months, he loves me right?" And "after our date, I walked home alone at 2am. Do you think he wants to be my boyfriend?" And even "I 32f am dating 37m and he wants me to pay for half of everything. What do you think girls?" What do I think? I think it would be better to be single and focus on my friendships. You should probably feel similarly. I'd make companionship comes at the cost of your self-respect, go without it. Fill your cup with emotional competent girls and gays that empower you to be unimpressed by lackluster courting. What makes courting above lackluster? These things, in my humble opinion:

1. Planning: for the first date he should give options for 2,3 activities and allow you to choose the one you prefer. He should coordinate travel for you. He should arrive early. He should actually be concerned about being responsible for your travel for the rest of his knowing you. What kind of man can look your parents in the eye and say "your daughter died on her to way to me or leaving being with me". A loser, that what kind.

2. Gifting: should he come to your home, he should have a gift. For a second date, he should have a small gift (flowers, candle, candy etc). For asking or commitment, he should give a piece of jewelry at a price point based on his income. For the rest of your relationship, he should buy you gifts all the time!

3. Doting: letting you sign for the bill and write the tip in once he's paid it, speaking loving and kind words to you multiple times a day, softening for you in a way he doesn't around men.

   
   
   
   

   If none of these things are happening. Keep your heart to yourself. In my opinion. Men

   don't deserve women's love. Historically, they've had to earn it. My sisters are suffering and I hope it ends soon.